A native Iowa Citian who returned to raise my family here, I find myself *far* more opinionated when it comes to everything from the restaurants to the city council. Here is my $.02.

Friday, January 27, 2006

Things To Do When You Are Up Late With Kiddos...

Watch programs you have dvr'd since late December and still have not watched. It's amazing how much time is saved using this technique.

Ponder the amazing ability of a dog to sleep on a comforter that was vomited on and think it's the best thing to happen since the random hump from the neighbor pooch last week.

Bribe husband for foot rub. Attempted bribe. When asked what it would take, his response "It's too big to wrap my mind around right now." Alright fine. Wait ten minutes and repeat shortly after reminding him that I recently gave birth to the second of two beautiful children. *Note: This did not work. My feet did not get rubbed.

Calculate every 14 minutes how much sleep you could get before you are again woke up by a someone less than two feet tall.

Document random thoughts that pop into your head due to either sleep deprivation or dehydration. Items include: The East side of Iowa City needs a car wash that does the inside and the outside of the car. Could a human survive on breast milk for a lifetime? How is it possible that no word in the English language rhymes with orange?

Crave things. I crave the oddest things when I am up late. Right now it's a big glass of strawberry milk. Disgusting under "normal" circumstances but sleep deprivation does odd things to me.

Glue things to things. Tonight I have glued Swarovski crystals to nuks and felt to twine. I was feeling crafty.

Remember your psychotic dreams caused by lack of sleep that lead to unconscious night rantings to your spouse. Last night I woke my husband up asking where my other babies were, apparently I thought we had triplets. I came too when I was trying to explain it to him and admitted I was delusional before passing out again.

Fall asleep at the computer...Wake up ten minutes later mad as hell for no reason giving husband dirty look for not rubbing feet and stomp up to bed. Realize that sheets are still in the dryer. Flop onto bed blaming husband for sheet incident and sleep for 8 minutes before being awoken by husband who wants to make bed. Ask him to rub feet and begin to cry when he says no due to the late hour.

Wonder why you didn't go to bed 5 hours ago.


Blogger threefunnymonkeys said...

Stand up comedy is in your future, my dear. Or at the very least a top seller book.

Sunday, February 05, 2006 6:55:00 AM

Blogger Sarah said...

Very entertaining as always! You always have me laughing out loud. Now I can quit hassling you to blog since I seem to depend solely on you for my on-line entertainment! :o)

Tuesday, February 07, 2006 7:48:00 AM


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